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The 7-11 Test

7eleven.jpgWhat is your neighborhood like? I think I've found a key of understanding. Travel to the nearest 7-11 in the midnight hour and observe.

If you live in a good neighborhood you might see high-school kids, fresh from McDonalds, looking for Mountain Dew: Code Red; people who are on a first name basis with the cashier; college aged girls looking for some ice cream; someone flipping through Esquire magazine; or no one at all.

If you live in a not-as-good neighborhood you might find abandoned socks in the parking lot; a sunburned chick with what looks like sharpie writing where a tramp-stamp belongs insisting to everyone that she's been robbed, but asking you not to call the cops on her behalf. You'll also find that there is always someone at the door asking you for something: a ride, some change, or some bags - as in, "gotsum BAGS man? ... DAMNIT!"

Posted on 6/5/2007 07:18 AM by Registered CommenterMichael Brendan Dougherty in | Comments6 Comments
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Reader Comments (6)

The best neighborhood wouldn't have a 7-11 at all, but instead an independent grocer who somehow manages to stay in business; oh, and who also closes at 10pm.
6/5/2007 02:03 PM | Unregistered CommenterSteve Nicoloso
Steve:
So true. When I read the title I thought Mr. Dougherty was going to point out that the mere presence of a 7-11 in a given neighborhood indicated with a fair degree of accuracy its socioeconomic standing.
Author:
I believe the word describing the second example is "vibrant."
6/6/2007 06:14 PM | Unregistered CommenterDennis
Indeed. A 7-11 is usually a bad sign. But I swear the one in Danbury CT. or the one in Glen Echo, Maryland is much friendlier than the several I find in Fairfax, Va.
6/6/2007 06:48 PM | Registered CommenterMichael Brendan Dougherty
Did you ever go to Holsten's? I never did, I don't think.
6/10/2007 11:13 PM | Unregistered CommenterBetsy
The 7-11 on River Rd. in Bethesda - the one near Friendship Hights & DC border, is one that could have been used to prove any point because the crowd always changed depending on the time of day - It's been a while,
6/13/2007 05:33 AM | Unregistered CommenterComment
HAHAHAHAHA. This is hilarious.

My own 7-11 happens to be a combination of the two. Less-good-than-normal in a way.

-PM
7/15/2007 10:36 PM | Unregistered CommenterPM Whitfield

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