Surfeited with Dainties - Michael Brendan Dougherty

Dan Rather

This piece is the best thing Chuck Lane has done since he fired Hayden Christensen for not wearing socks and making-crap-up at The New Republic. The Church of George H.W. Bush? And they didn't suspect anything? I digress.

I don't normally go in for bashing the usual hate-figures held up by conservatives, but Dan Rather is a fine exception to make. His mind-destroying style fake folksiness was grating. His suits, despite coming from the a respected Savile Row firm were not nearly as sharp as those of his competitors.

In countries more civilized than ours the job Dan Rather had is properly called "newsreader." Because guys like Tom Brokaw and Brian Williams (the sneaky Canadian) dress with some style, have a certain timbre in their voices, and the most boring personal lives (if their profiles are to be believed), the masses take them to be serious people. I'm here on this blog to remind you: they read a teleprompter.Someone who makes a small fraction of their salary lightly daubs foundation on their cheeks just moments before they go on air.

Edward R. Murrow, hero of serious minded teleprompter readers like Keith Olbermann, hawked tobacco, and taped his voice over recordings of gun battle for his World War II reporting. Chaps like Edward R. Murrow or Keith Olbermann are only considered serious people by intelligent people who don't read books - people who believe that mastery of history can be gained by watching the History Channel or Ken Burns documentaries.

Just as a side note: I've never met a serious person who didn't have serious virtues and/or serious vices - usually in frightful combinations. Newsreaders like Brian Williams are so chosen for their profession precisely because there is nothing frightful about them. Can you imagine Williams seducing a 25 year old staffer? Or fasting and praying for forty days in repentance for his sins?

Exactly.

Posted on 9/24/2007 06:43 AM by

Michael Brendan Dougherty in Politics |

4 Comments |

You Gotta Bereave

I'm not happy. I attended opening day at Shea in 2006. Tom Glavine pitched against Dontrelle Willis. A pitcher's duel. The Mets won it in the 9th. david Wright had a triple - I'd never seen that live before. I was impressed with Glavine, I was impressed with Duaner Sanchez and Billy Wagner. I hadn't been to a Mets game again until last Saturday. I was prepared for the Mets to end the Phillies playoff hopes. Instead, Carlos Beltran misjudged a ball lined into center. The Philly fans got rambunctious and several of them were tossed. This week, I atended two games in D.C. Willie Randolph let John Maine pitch way too long on Tuesday. On Wednesday the Mets won handily. Last night I sat at a bar in Fairfax watching the game with another local Mets fan. Oddly, he went to school with the NY Sun neo-conservative journalist Eli Lake - who recently called my magazine an anti-American publication. "Eli's as liberal as they come," my new friend said, "but he voted for Bush. He's all 'We can't fuck with this terrorism shit.' Ha ha. "

Anyway - the Mets blew two three-run leads in the gams the Phillies made a tremendous comeback to defeat the Nationals in the last homestand for RFK stadium. The Phillies look confident all the time now, even when they play from behind. The Mets look nervous , even when they lead late.

Who decided firing hitting coach Rick Downs would be a good idea? Reyes looks like he did in early 2005 - swinging wildly at balls that fall at his feet. The only difference is that he pops them up more and gets caught stealing more often. Also, why did we let our most reliable bullpen pieces go? We could use Chad Bradford. We could use Darren Oliver - the most underrated member of our excellent 2006 pen.

I still think we're going to pull this out. But every time Mota runs toward the mound I'm going to sink lower in my seat. Every time Reyes is up with an RBI oppurtunity I think I'm going to sarcastically say "pop-up." When Heilman cruises through the first two outs in the 8th with a two run lead, I'm going to expect him to throw a meatball that will land in the CitiField construction site. 2006 is over - now I remember what it's like to be a Mets fan.

Posted on 9/21/2007 12:11 PM by

Michael Brendan Dougherty in Sports |

The Most Important Work in 2 Centuries

I know I'm a late-comer on this. But "The Suit" by Nicholas Antongiavanni (aka Michael Anton) is the most important book for living given to man since "The Imitation of Christ", by Thomas a'Kempis. This work is a blow against the vulgarians who populate our streets, our places of business, even our churches. All men who aspire to rise above schlubbiness must read it.

Posted on 9/20/2007 10:18 PM by

Michael Brendan Dougherty in Fashion |

2 Comments |

My Disembodied Voice

Do you live in Connecticut? Do you want to hear me talk about Mike Huckabee even more? I thought so. I'll be up and down the AM dial - 1470 Meriden, 1240 Waterbury, 610 Torrington, and 1360 out of Hartford around 3 p.m.

After that, I'll be on driving up to New York. I haven't decided whether to take 95 (risky on a Friday) or go through Pennsylvania up 81 through Scranton. I deliberately choose my routes at the last minute - to confuse my enemies.

More blogging soon.

Posted on 9/7/2007 10:25 AM by